/ life

The Pregnancy Announcement

Everyone I know in real life already knows I’m pregnant, and a few people who follow me on twitter probably know as well.

I think I’d like to write about it a bit as the months go on, because it’s interesting to keep track of how things are going and maybe some people who are interested in my life will want to hear about it too.

Most people probably won’t care so much, because it’s kind of same-old same-old – every story of pregnancy and motherhood is basically the same, right? Unless you have something terrible happen to you and then you might write a very sad story about it and a bunch of morbid people will come and read it.

Hopefully that is not how my story ends 🙂

I’ve also been a bit worried about talking too much about my pregnancy, because, well, privacy for one thing – I used to blog all the time about everything, but as you probably know, I basically never blog anymore, mainly because of the whole privacy thing. (And also because social media is a big ego fest and everyone talks about themselves all the time and maybe as I got older I realized how icky that made me feel to be doing it myself.)

…and the other reason is because a few people who I am loosely “friends” with online have suffered some very bad losses, and it seems insensitive to crow about my good fortune when they are struggling with still births, infertility, and cancer.

Ok so what changed with these two reasons?

Well the first one: I’m going to try to be a bit more public without being too public, if I can. And as for the whole ego thing – that still makes me feel a bit icky so we’ll see how things go, but I’m hoping I can strike a balance and write about myself and my life as if it’s a journal to share with friends and family (and the Internet at large I guess 😬) without feeling like I’m self-absorbed. This is probably impossible, but time will tell. Imma try! Certainly there are a few other bloggers out there who have found that balance, IMO. (and lots who haven’t, but some have!)

As for the second: I feel really badly for those people who have had terrible luck with their health and with their fertility. And until the day I die, I will worry that it could happen to me too, at any moment. I’m 24 weeks pregnant, and out of the main danger zone according to any doctor, but there’s always still some risk. And even after you give birth, you spend your whole life hoping your children don’t die before you do. It really could happen to anyone, and it’s a terrible part of life.

So I don’t think I want the misfortunes of others to stop me from living and writing about my own life for now, and for people who feel uncomfortable or sad reading about how things are going for me, you have all my sympathy, and please don’t read my blog if it makes you sad, because I don’t want that for you ❤️

At 24 weeks I’m already more than halfway through the pregnancy, as anyone who knows anything about pregnancy probably realized. For those of you used to the whole “Pregnancy is 9 months long” instead of counting by weeks, 24 weeks = the beginning of month #6. My due date is in late December.

So far, everything has been going really well. I was convinced for the first 13 weeks or so that something bad would happen and I would miscarry, but as each week ticked by with nothing but good news, my fears slowly disappeared, and these days I don’t worry too much.

I still read sad stories about horrible outcomes at 32 weeks, but I feel pretty safe knowing that kind of story is not the norm, and am not too worried about my own situation.

In terms of symptoms, I definitely had symptoms in the first trimester, but they were relatively mild, and I think that if I didn’t know I was pregnant, I wouldn’t have figured it out by my symptoms. I never vomited, never had extreme urges to pee, and while I did take naps a bit more than usual, I wouldn’t say I was completely exhausted. All of it could have easily been written off as nothing out of the ordinary.

Probably my most extreme symptom in the first trimester was an incredible hunger first thing every morning: I simply had to eat, and felt like I would die if I didn’t find something to chow down on ASAP.

Second trimester: Again, pretty easy. All the symptoms of the first trimester disappeared, and now I am mainly just a bit awkward with the extra weight around my stomach. The extra weight isn't substantial – no strangers have approached me to congratulate me or anything – but it’s enough to feel weird when I’m used to being tiny.

I felt movement for the first time at 15 weeks, far earlier than I expected, and it has gotten stronger with every passing week. For the uninitiatd in pregnancy: Feeling movement is a mixture of really exciting and awesome, occasionally distracting and annoying, especially when you’re trying to sleep, and finally, reassuring when you haven’t felt anything for awhile.

Third trimester: Hasn’t started yet. Starts in 2 weeks. We’ll see how that goes. I’m expecting it to suck a bit 🙂

Health wise, eveything has been fine. All ultrasounds have checked out as normal, all blood tests have been good (so far! I have a few more to go and I am suddenly parinoid about testing positive for Gestational Diabetes. Always something to be parinoid about right? 🙃). At our first appointemnt, the midwife said, “Good, you’re young,” when I told her I was 30, which was a very pleasant surprise, since I always thought the optimal age to have kids was when you were 21 or something, and I was worried I’d be considered middle-aged in terms of child bearing. But I guess not!

Oh, and in case you were wondering: It’s a girl. We have some names that we’re feeling pretty good about, but we’re keeping them a secret until the birth 🙂